This Friday morning, I will be climbing into my father's van, along with both my parents and my father's brother, the priest, for a 4-6 hour journey to southwestern Vermont, there to participate in my brother's wedding (this is the brother who starred in my Thanksgiving post, last year).
In marked difference from all other family weddings I've been connected to, this guest list consists primarily (and almost exclusively, to my parents' knowledge) of immediate family -- bride & groom's parents, siblings, and nieces/nephews -- but that's it. (Contrast this with all the other weddings in this and the prior generation, which included *at least* the full family from bride & groom back to grandparents, aunts and uncles, first cousins, etc., plus a bunch of friends.) It doesn't sound like many, if any, personal friends are invited, either.
I'd been thinking the guest list for this one was to be as large as those of the past, with plenty of people I know and enjoy to hang out and have fun with, before and after the official parts I am to play in the pre-ceremony (scripted by sister-in-law-to-be, fairly simple, and should be done within 30 minutes or less).
But now I'm thinking otherwise. Though I do generally get along fine with my non-groom brother, his wife and sons, my sister, and my parents and uncle... I'm now thinking that I'd like to have someone else along who has a bit more connection to me and my everyday circles of friends and activities.
Unfortunately, and also somewhat unusual for me, I am not currently involved in a sufficiently significant relationship with someone that I feel comfortable assuming that person would be willing to brave the somewhat unusual dynamics of my family, though I think that all of those with whom I'm currently involved would probably have a reasonably good time, and emerge relatively unscathed by the experience. (Else, I'd not be making this post at all.)
So, to the meat of the matter.
What are you doing this coming weekend -- the 23rd to 25th? Does the prospect of some ad hoc social anthropology interest you? How about some drinking, dining, dancing, and/or discreet debauchery, while dissecting dysfunctional dynamics?
Transportation will be provided, if you can join us Friday morning (I have to be there for rehearsal Friday evening); else, I'll give you directions, and I'm happy to share or handle the return-trip driving and round-trip gas. I will also cover meals as necessary.
Accommodations are also covered. Though you'd probably be sharing my bed (I don't know if the room reserved for me has one or two beds), if we don't have a sexual relationship, it need not go there....
Here's the fun part -- your wedding wardrobe has to satisfy the fairly simple "guest" rules posted by the bride. (The social anthropology begins... and all other wardrobe is entirely free-form, as might be considered usual.)
Guests ~ Please wear semi-formal attire. Black dresses, skirt & tops for ladies in knee to tea lengths, NO pants! Black slacks and black solid shirts, NO neckties and suits (unless you really, really want to wear one)! Keep attire simple and elegant. For the ladies nude pantyhose (if any) and have fun with your jewelry.
LADIES - Keep attire simple and elegant. You will need to wear a black dress or top & skirt set. This is a semi-formal event so please choose a length from the knee to ankle. NO pants PLEASE! Nude pantyhose (if any) and have fun with your jewelry.
JEWELRY ~ Have fun with your jewelry...Gold, silver, glass, crystals and diamonds...the bigger the better!!! And, definitely lots of multi-colored pearls. If you are making something it would be great if it matched your outfit. And...if you show up with out jewelry or do not have anything to wear...we will let you borrow something.
Yeah, I'm screening responses to this one, at least to start. Commentary and discussion will likely be unscreened. Expressions of interest are likely to be kept private.... Not because I'm ashamed of any of you who are likely to respond, but I don't want to make this hurtful nor a public competition, on the admittedly small chance I receive multiple expressions of interest...
I may not wind up with a traveling companion even if there are several interested responses. Timing and other factors are obviously still in the "to be negotiated" realm, and we have only the shortest time to do so. I trust there will be no hard feelings if *you* express interest and then aren't taken up on your kind offer.
EDIT -- I should have noted, part of the motivation for the wardrobe guidance/restrictions above is that the photography from the wedding is likely to serve a dual purpose, becoming advertising fodder for the bride's company, which is primarily focused on creation and sale of custom Renaissance-styled wedding attire...